Waiting.
Waiting.
Waiting.
Gosh. Waiting is excruciating.
That period where everything is in a tangled mess. You're able to see the different ends of each strands yet unable to differentiate which is which. A wrong pull may cause more tangling, or it may untangle the whole mess. So you wait. Considering, pondering, weighing each different possibilities. No matter how much you want it to end fast, without care and measured, precise steps, it will only make things even worse than it was. So you wait, and prepare. Until the time come. Until, just like how a light shines in a dark cavern, revealing so much, of all the thing that were there, but unseen before this, you see the right way to untangle that mess, grab the strand that's truly the one you're looking, and move on.
And so here I am. Waiting. For an end to come so a new beginning may begin. I pray for wisdom in my decisions and for anxiousness in waiting to subside. When the wait is over, hopefully I am ready.
Anyways, I can't believe I'm flying back to KK really, really soon now. Hopefully my last week in The Undershop goes well and smoothly. Hehe! Oh, and Selamat Berpuasa to all my Muslim friends! :D
Just being random in this post. Byeeee! :D
Tuesday, July 24, 2012
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
A To-Do-List Back Home
I have come to a firm realisation that there ain't no place better than home. And just 20 days from now, that's where I'll be heading back to. Home. Since I might be staying at home for no longer than a month probably because of universities or sudden changes of events, I have decided to spend it wisely. The best way to do so would be to plan it. Yup. Plan, plan and plan. So I came out with a to-do-list. Hopefully I'll have them all ticked by the time my holiday ends (should my plan for the gap year won't be successful). And here it is!
1. Food!!!
Seriously, I don't care what people say, but to me, KK has some of the best tasting food I have ever had. From the divine sang nyuk mien (a pork noodle, whoever created that dish, THANK YOU!) and lush ngiu chap (beef noodles) to pisang goreng (banana fritters, the one outside SM All Saints, my old school) and scrumptious wo tie (dumplings). Yummmm... And my mommy's cooking! I crave y'all!
2. Drive.
I miss driving. It's been ridiculously long since I place my hand on a steering wheel. So yeah. I don't care where to. Even if it's to drive my mom to bank, or to get grocery, to drive my bro to school or to his futsal, seriously, I don't mind. I wanna drive hahaha!
3. Work on something new.
Don't know for sure yet what it's gonna be. Perhaps photography or work on some new sketches. :D Finish unread books and learn something new I guess. Anything would be fine. Gain more muscle mass too maybe. Hmmmm...
4. FRIENDS!
Yup. Hangout! Especially since Jacqie is coming back, it's definitely a sign from God for a good hangout session, with Karaoke? Maybe? I miss all of them ppl. So excited right now. :D
5. Beaches...
Always loved them. The rolling waves. The sand stuck between my toes. Dead jellyfishes. Hermit crabs scurrying across the sands. The scenery. Breathtaking. Roasted peanuts and steamed corns. The heat and shades under big trees. A friendly reminder, Please keep our beaches clean!
6. Spending time with my family
Yup, important! No words could express how much I miss times spent with my family. I MISS THEM!!!
7. Sleep...
I miss my bed. Cause it creaks a lot. Like a lot. My blanket and the coolness of my room. Ahhh... Zzzzzzzz...
8. Stare at the tree outside my house while reflecting on my life and the future.
I used to do it all the time. Whenever I'm revisioning. Pretty calming I dare say. It's like so hot out there, yet the tree just continues growing. It's like... So... Deep...
9. Visit the school!
I wonder how my school looks like. Ol All Saints. How thee fare? The look of young faces preparing to face their examinations, thinking its the worst, when life has much more prepared, a lot more challenging ones. How I used to be just like that. And the path to school every morning. The morning sky slowly drawing more light from the sun. It's beautiful.
10. Be totally random!
That would be fun. I wouldn't know what I might be doing. But I hope I can do something really random back home. :) Muahahaha!
Hopefully I won't just spend my whole time doing item No.7... Lol...
Dear readers, if somehow you are away from home and miss it badly, find a good friend and talk about it or just make yourself busy with stuff to get rid of the homesickness. And if you're right at home, treasure your family n keep every moment special.
So long, see you on my next post!
1. Food!!!
Seriously, I don't care what people say, but to me, KK has some of the best tasting food I have ever had. From the divine sang nyuk mien (a pork noodle, whoever created that dish, THANK YOU!) and lush ngiu chap (beef noodles) to pisang goreng (banana fritters, the one outside SM All Saints, my old school) and scrumptious wo tie (dumplings). Yummmm... And my mommy's cooking! I crave y'all!
2. Drive.
I miss driving. It's been ridiculously long since I place my hand on a steering wheel. So yeah. I don't care where to. Even if it's to drive my mom to bank, or to get grocery, to drive my bro to school or to his futsal, seriously, I don't mind. I wanna drive hahaha!
3. Work on something new.
Don't know for sure yet what it's gonna be. Perhaps photography or work on some new sketches. :D Finish unread books and learn something new I guess. Anything would be fine. Gain more muscle mass too maybe. Hmmmm...
4. FRIENDS!
Yup. Hangout! Especially since Jacqie is coming back, it's definitely a sign from God for a good hangout session, with Karaoke? Maybe? I miss all of them ppl. So excited right now. :D
5. Beaches...
Always loved them. The rolling waves. The sand stuck between my toes. Dead jellyfishes. Hermit crabs scurrying across the sands. The scenery. Breathtaking. Roasted peanuts and steamed corns. The heat and shades under big trees. A friendly reminder, Please keep our beaches clean!
6. Spending time with my family
Yup, important! No words could express how much I miss times spent with my family. I MISS THEM!!!
7. Sleep...
I miss my bed. Cause it creaks a lot. Like a lot. My blanket and the coolness of my room. Ahhh... Zzzzzzzz...
8. Stare at the tree outside my house while reflecting on my life and the future.
I used to do it all the time. Whenever I'm revisioning. Pretty calming I dare say. It's like so hot out there, yet the tree just continues growing. It's like... So... Deep...
9. Visit the school!
I wonder how my school looks like. Ol All Saints. How thee fare? The look of young faces preparing to face their examinations, thinking its the worst, when life has much more prepared, a lot more challenging ones. How I used to be just like that. And the path to school every morning. The morning sky slowly drawing more light from the sun. It's beautiful.
10. Be totally random!
That would be fun. I wouldn't know what I might be doing. But I hope I can do something really random back home. :) Muahahaha!
Hopefully I won't just spend my whole time doing item No.7... Lol...
Dear readers, if somehow you are away from home and miss it badly, find a good friend and talk about it or just make yourself busy with stuff to get rid of the homesickness. And if you're right at home, treasure your family n keep every moment special.
So long, see you on my next post!
Monday, July 16, 2012
Decisions!
So... It's been really, really long since I last posted anything in a blog. And I think I'm gonna start once again. Felt the need to just pour out my hearts and type it all out, esp. since so much is going on right now.
Currently working in The Undershop. Selling underwear. Lucrative commissions would be one main thing as to why I love working here, apart from awesome colleagues, just plain weird and interesting occasional customers, not as tiring as when I was working for a clothing shop (namely, Body Glove...), and great experiences. This job of mine is coming to an end on the 31st of July and I'll be heading back to Kota Kinabalu, Sabah after almost 5 months I think since the last CNY holiday when I actually slept on my own creaking bed. I miss home a lot. My dad, mom, bro and so much more. Just the sight of the big, blue sky of KK is enough to keep me going happy all day (granted it's not too hot, lol) and my fishes in the aquarium, my pet terrapins, and the smell of freedom and of my Mommy's Curry/Rendang.
But heading home means I'll be making a huge decision in my life. A turning point I'd say. You see dear readers, I was given the "privilege" to enter one of the top 5 local universities in Malaysia. Not UM, not USM, not UPM either... it's.... UTM!!! And it's located in the southern end of Peninsula Malaysia! On the state known as Johor. But I have decided to turn down the offer. Kinda crazy? Yes? No? I don't know... I'm still thinking about it. I have till 22 of July to make my decision. I got Landscape Architecture as the course I'm supposed to be pursuing there. It's not what I love really, but rather... something... I can do. But I don't know, it's just confusing, the only push that makes me wanna actually study there would be its less of a burden to my parents with its government funded fees and the fact it's near Singapore :D lol... But it just too much for me with a bunch of decisions such as having to move from Sunway, to whether or not I'll be taking this course or wait for the scholarship offer from Taylor's which are just overwhelming. I mean, I'm working at a 12 hour shift most of the days lately, I'm going into gila stress mode. @.@ (F.Y.I gila means crazy in Bahasa Malaysia)
Hence, after a deep reflection and serious thinking, I found out there's apparently another alternative. Yup. I am thinking of having me, myself and I a gap year. A gap year? According to Wikipedia, Gap Year, an expression associated with taking time out to travel between life stages. It is also known as a sabbatical, time off, time out and a year out, referring to a period of time (not necessarily 12 months) in which people disengage from curricular education and/or work and undertake activities such as travelling, volunteering or working abroad. So yeah, sounds good to me. Itsnot really popular in our Asian culture since everything revolves around doing things fast and finishing it ASAP, but it's good to slow down sometimes. I'll find something to do, perhaps helping my mom in setting up a new business or spend more church time or travel somewhere or start posting on YouTube once again haha... And hopefully, in that period, I'll be able to make up my mind. Hopefully. I pray.
So, I shall be turning down the offer I guess. And if God is willing, I will not regret it. And if by this week, somehow, with a turn of events, I might just accept the offer, and be on my way to Skudai, Johor Bahru. Ahhh... life, how playful and full of surprises you are.
Whatever is the outcome, I'll be sure to give it my best with God's grace. :)
So dear readers, if your life has been stomped with a big question as this in life, leaving you all dazed and unsure, worried and worn out at one point of life, once before this or in the future, keep your faith and strive hard, and you'll get through it just as I believe I will, someday. Alright?
Till the next post. Be strong and treasure each moment.
Quote of the day:
Do not plant your dreams in the field of indecision, where nothing ever grows but the weeds of "what-if." ~Dodinsky
Currently working in The Undershop. Selling underwear. Lucrative commissions would be one main thing as to why I love working here, apart from awesome colleagues, just plain weird and interesting occasional customers, not as tiring as when I was working for a clothing shop (namely, Body Glove...), and great experiences. This job of mine is coming to an end on the 31st of July and I'll be heading back to Kota Kinabalu, Sabah after almost 5 months I think since the last CNY holiday when I actually slept on my own creaking bed. I miss home a lot. My dad, mom, bro and so much more. Just the sight of the big, blue sky of KK is enough to keep me going happy all day (granted it's not too hot, lol) and my fishes in the aquarium, my pet terrapins, and the smell of freedom and of my Mommy's Curry/Rendang.
But heading home means I'll be making a huge decision in my life. A turning point I'd say. You see dear readers, I was given the "privilege" to enter one of the top 5 local universities in Malaysia. Not UM, not USM, not UPM either... it's.... UTM!!! And it's located in the southern end of Peninsula Malaysia! On the state known as Johor. But I have decided to turn down the offer. Kinda crazy? Yes? No? I don't know... I'm still thinking about it. I have till 22 of July to make my decision. I got Landscape Architecture as the course I'm supposed to be pursuing there. It's not what I love really, but rather... something... I can do. But I don't know, it's just confusing, the only push that makes me wanna actually study there would be its less of a burden to my parents with its government funded fees and the fact it's near Singapore :D lol... But it just too much for me with a bunch of decisions such as having to move from Sunway, to whether or not I'll be taking this course or wait for the scholarship offer from Taylor's which are just overwhelming. I mean, I'm working at a 12 hour shift most of the days lately, I'm going into gila stress mode. @.@ (F.Y.I gila means crazy in Bahasa Malaysia)
Hence, after a deep reflection and serious thinking, I found out there's apparently another alternative. Yup. I am thinking of having me, myself and I a gap year. A gap year? According to Wikipedia, Gap Year, an expression associated with taking time out to travel between life stages. It is also known as a sabbatical, time off, time out and a year out, referring to a period of time (not necessarily 12 months) in which people disengage from curricular education and/or work and undertake activities such as travelling, volunteering or working abroad. So yeah, sounds good to me. Itsnot really popular in our Asian culture since everything revolves around doing things fast and finishing it ASAP, but it's good to slow down sometimes. I'll find something to do, perhaps helping my mom in setting up a new business or spend more church time or travel somewhere or start posting on YouTube once again haha... And hopefully, in that period, I'll be able to make up my mind. Hopefully. I pray.
So, I shall be turning down the offer I guess. And if God is willing, I will not regret it. And if by this week, somehow, with a turn of events, I might just accept the offer, and be on my way to Skudai, Johor Bahru. Ahhh... life, how playful and full of surprises you are.
Whatever is the outcome, I'll be sure to give it my best with God's grace. :)
So dear readers, if your life has been stomped with a big question as this in life, leaving you all dazed and unsure, worried and worn out at one point of life, once before this or in the future, keep your faith and strive hard, and you'll get through it just as I believe I will, someday. Alright?
Till the next post. Be strong and treasure each moment.
Quote of the day:
Do not plant your dreams in the field of indecision, where nothing ever grows but the weeds of "what-if." ~Dodinsky
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